Mythical Standards
One of the conversations I find myself having with all too often with students is grounded in this randomized expectation and the resulting disappointment in movement abilities. It seems with all of the #inspo and #goals we consume via tv/movies and social media that we’ve somehow created these mythical standards dictating what we should be able to do and how long it should take “because we’ve been doing (insert apparatus) for this many months or years.” This line of thinking actually keeps us forever trapped in a model of comparison, stuck and frustrated because of what we *think* we should be able to do, rather than appreciative of what we can do and have achieved.
Let’s start with what a “Mythical Standard” actually is. We know a standard is defined as a rule of measure or something established by authority, custom, or general consent as a model or example. It becomes mythical when we start to apply that arbitrarily, unnecessarily and unrealistically to ourselves or our students. I’ve noticed that many of the things students think they should be able to do are based on what they see other’s (near and far) doing. But there’s a whole lot of context missing from what you see posted, streamed and shared.
This line of thinking is disappointing and dangerous. Besides impacting your mental-emotional and self-worth, it can also lead to injury if it’s something your body isn’t ready for or something you’re trying to force your body to do. Like Regina George, I’m here to tell you to STOP trying to make fetch happen! Now, I’m not saying give up on your goals. Goals are important! What I am saying is to get specific about the goals you want and why you want them.
I personally think we just get excited and impressed by something cool we see and instead of simply allowing ourselves to say: “that’s dope”, “I love the way that looks” or “I’d like to grow to where I can try that one day,” we instead tell ourselves “I NEED to do that” or “I SHOULD” be able to do that. And if it shows up in your feed, studio or on a competition stage near you then that seems to amplify the thought that it is a must do.
Understand that another person’s abilities or movement style does not have to be and really shouldn’t be yours. Respect your body, respect your level and create your own style. Yes there are certainly some foundational movements and ranges that we need to be able to strongly and safely put ourselves through as we progress on our movement journeys, however get clear on what’s foundational vs. what’s not. Now that’s not to say that we shouldn’t have movement goals that we are working towards, but it is to say that we should pick out realistic goals and treat them as things we’d like to do and not things that we should be able to do. From there get with an experienced coach to learn your body’s challenges and abilities, understand the demands of our sport and the desired move and then build a realistic training plan to help you close that gap.
And remember, your self-worth isn’t and shouldn’t be determined by what moves you can do.
Here’s a little exercise I want you to do. Grab a pen and a notebook and answer these questions:
- How do you THINK you should move?
- What do you THINK you should be able to do?
- How easy do you THINK that should be?
- How did you come to these conclusions above?
Send me your responses and then let’s talk about it!
